When I was a freshman in college, I made the decision to terminate an unplanned pregnancy. I discovered I was pregnant after taking a pregnancy test following a missed period, and surely enough the test confirmed I was carrying.
When I saw the positive pregnancy test result, I immediately knew what I had to do. There was no way I could sustain another life when I didn’t even have a complete grip on my own. I was still living at home and just starting my college journey, and I didn’t really have a relationship with the person who impregnated me, so I chose to get an abortion.
At the time I told no one, except a friend who had once gotten an abortion herself. I was afraid of what other people would think of my choice, but my friend really guided me through the process. She referred me to Planned Parenthood and within a week of finding out I was pregnant, I went into the clinic and terminated my pregnancy.
Photo credit: COURTESY OF CASSY JONES-MCBRYDE
Photo credit: COURTESY OF CASSY JONES-MCBRYDE
Now, about two decades later, I work at Planned Parenthood. It wasn’t something I planned, but I consider it to be a case of serendipity. In my role as the first Black Organizing Program Coordinator for Planned Parenthood Advocates of Michigan, I lead organizing efforts and advocacy work centered around the black community and their limited access to reproductive health services.
I’ve only been in the role for less than a year, but my familiarity with the nonprofit goes way back.
When I had my abortion, the people at Planned Parenthood could not have been more supportive.
They reaffirmed the idea that I was the only one who had the power to decide what was right for me. The day I went in, there were about three or four women across the street holding up signs pushing anti-abortion rhetoric. The signs were graphic images of bloody embryos, but I wasn’t fazed by them since I often passed the clinic on my way to school and was already used to seeing the disturbing signs.
When I went into the doctor’s office, it honestly felt like I was at a gynecologist’s office getting a pap smear. I felt some slight discomfort during the abortion procedure, but it all happened so quickly, much more quickly than I had imagined it would.
After getting the abortion, the one emotion I felt was relieved. The week in between finding out I was pregnant and terminating the pregnancy was difficult. I wasn’t conflicted about my choice, but rather the perceptions of what others would have of me. My mother had so much hope for my future and my family didn’t even know I was sexually active. Sex was just something we didn’t discuss, and though I know they would have been supportive, I didn’t want them to feel like I had compromised or limited my future.
But if there was one thing I could change about my personal process, it’s that I wish I would have told family sooner, instead of worrying what others would think due to the negative stigmas surrounding abortion.
I first came to Planned Parenthood in 2019 as a volunteer, more than 20 years after I had my abortion.
I was trying to infiltrate different spaces in Detroit to advocate for plus-sized women. In fact, I had founded my own nonprofit called the International Fuller Women Network, which focuses on body positive messaging and connecting plus-sized women to resources that help them celebrate who they are through activities like fashion shows, forums, and peer support groups.
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https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/biggest-emotion-felt-abortion-relief-110000235.html