How to become successful in the corporate world

Being successful in the corporate world was probably one of the easiest achievements in my life.

  1. Where everyone went left
    1. I went right
  2. Where everyone said, don’t do that
    1. I did that
  3. When everyone said, you are breaching internal corporate rules
    1. I didnt give a fuck. Break the rules, not the law.
  4. When everyone told me, come in at 8am
    1. I got in at 6am
  5. When they told me, do x,y,z for this year
    1. I did the entire alphabet
  6. When no one wanted to do that presentation
    1. I raised my hand, sure I’ll do it.
  7. When they told me in my face, fuck you Ross, you will get nowhere in life, you don’t behave, you are rude, arrogant, obnoxious
    1. I wait for him to finish.

You see, corporate way of living is easy.

Everytime I had some small dickweed Napoleon telling me how wrong I was.

I knew I was heading in the right direction. I stood on their penis, their pride, their ego. They felt challenged, invaded. Good. Feel threatened. I don’t give a fuck about your small little corporate island you are trying to defend. I care about the problem, and that I want to solve.

With or without you.

I must have told 100s of time in my life;

FIRE ME if you don’t like me.

Never happened. I was always seen. I made sure I performed. When senior Doofus and Mickey had to do their promotion round, I was always on paper.

The other way to be successful is to behave, be polite, listen, be politically correct, kiss the right ass, and *fingers crossed* you might get there too…

Quora

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